In the Begining...

I recently discovered I have been in denial over my daughter’s diagnosis in late 2010. Although I research the topic I felt this was a phase and she would "grow out of being autistic". It sounds so silly now when I actually type it out. I guess I need to get this off my chest and tell my story. I am currently seeing more support for my family and daughter. My daughter who we can call Sam was born at 38 weeks by c section. I had been insulin dependant for the last trimester of my pregnancy. It was a tough delivery as I didn’t have progress and a emergency c section was initiated. Sam didn’t like to latch and that made breast feeding difficult. I felt that it was too much effort and eventually pumped the milk as she loved it in the bottle. Around 1 month we started formula and sometime after that she developed what was later diagnosed as GURD. She would wake in the night coughing so hard she would have actually had thrown up. This stopped a few months later and she seemed fine. It was not until she was two that we realized she was different. There has been so many things that when I think back now they all click as to why she was the way she was and did what she did. Sam will be four this May and I suspect she has Asperger’s syndrome. It has been a struggle to get help and find resources. Some days I feel so sad and lost and other day I have much hope. I know things happen for a reason and Sam is destined for great things. I really feel that although right now I feel like my world has been disrupted I know I will be able to overcome this for her sake. Her father also struggles with this and I am the one who coordinates her care and makes sure all the paperwork and things for evaluations get completed. It is hard but just being here and doing this is making all the difference in the world for me. For other mothers I encourage you to share your story and talk, fathers too. The more we band together, the better environment we can create for our children. My story had much more to be written and I know when I am done it would have all been worth it.

What I Will Be When I Grow Up!

I have been presented with a huge opportunity and feel the need to further my goals of completing awareness. So much I used to talk about what type of person I would be if I were born in the area or civil right or even women’s rights. I know I would have been a fighter. Now I know what I need to fight for. A woman with autism is something I never really considered until today. Having a daughter with autism for nearly the past two years have given me the need to research and develop a theory on how I am dealing, coping and accomplishing the task of scheduling appointments and making sure she shows progress. As I look for more information, it finally clicks that I need to consider diving further in the world of girls who have autism. It seems only right. So far a lot of the information I have found is centered on boys with autism. I think I need to dig deeper and research more to figure this out and come up with more answers. So far all the information that I have found on females with autism seem to fit Samara and although I hate to admit it, I can actually see her future and know right now that this is going to be a long road and I am going to have to be the one to fight for her and defend her rights as this is a new idea and concept,women with autism.